Do I have the onions to do it again?
That's the question embedded in my head as I travel to Havasupai Falls in the Grand Canyon next week.
It's my third trip to the cyan blue water filled oasis tucked away among the red rock and Supai Indian Reservation.
My first trip in 2010 I chickened out, but redeemed myself last year and jumped off the 30 foot Navajo Falls waterfall.
I told myself it would by a one time thing.
And yet I am already considering it again. Not sure why. I made it through unscathed and will always say I did it.
Maybe it is mid-life crisis thing. I'm 43. How many more years will my knees and back hold up to make the 40 mile trek over four days?
Ever since first seeing the waterfall it has been pulling me in like an undertow.
I was still hesitant last year until there were about five people, mostly girls, half my age doing it like they were jumping off a small diving board.
It was enough to get me back to the top of Navajo Falls. I was again faced with the 'What if' something went wrong and I had to wait hours before emergency crews could get to me.
Instead of thinking at the top, I just took the leap. Before I knew it was my heart was going crazy and I was counting - One 1,000, two 1,000, three and SPLASH.
I pulled it off and I will probably never do it again, but at least now that void has been filled.
Unless the adrenaline gets the best of me again. My hope is no. The idea of getting hurt in the middle of nowhere is scary. But yet I can't stop thinking about it.
I guess only time will tell.
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