Two monks were washing their bowls in the river when they noticed a scorpion that was drowning. One monk immediately scooped it up and set it upon the bank.

In the process he was stung.

He went back to washing his bowl and again the scorpion fell in. The monk saved the scorpion and was again stung.

The other monk asked him, “Friend, why do you continue to help the scorpion when you know its nature is to sting?”

“Because,” the monk replied, “to help is in my nature.”

I just love this story as it exemplifies how perception and a commitment to service can impact how we view our life’s events, circumstances and purpose.

Through the demands of a busy life, we often find ourselves pushing and going, and perhaps neglecting our greatest innate needs; one of which I believe is to be of some form of service or assistance. Through service or assisting another, I believe we are often able to diminish our own internal struggles or pain, as our focus becomes “other-focused.”

When we work with clients, a constant theme we encounter is that life is extremely demanding and full; and then when one finally does take a moment for reflection, he or she is at times are surprised by how fast he has been moving and often one can neglect his or her deeper desire to have meaning and fulfillment. What we find to be very common is that a sense of connection to others has been lost.

Now, more than ever, I believe through challenges many people lose sight of what it means to be of service, and then I often find that clients report that their reactions to life’s circumstances are more reactive than the past, and furthermore they seem to crave more authentic, healthier and productive relationships. Said another way, many are craving depth, and community and meaning.

If thinking like this speaks to you, and perhaps you may find some of these statements applying to you, here are a few profound questions that you can ask yourself: “What are my greatest gifts and how might I apply them to help another person? What can I do outside of my regular routine to more greatly connect to what matters most? What do I need to let go of, do less of, or perhaps re-introduce into my routine? Who needs my help and how can I reach out to assist?”

Through the surrendering of self, even for 15 minutes a week, you might just be surprised to how light and relieved you might feel. People need what you have to offer. Somewhere, someone can benefit from your help, mentoring, and support. Who knows, this might just become a new way of life for you or someone you know.

• Dr. Jason Kolber is a licensed doctor of chiropractic and a certified life coach. Reach him at (480) 704-2787 or

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