Daddy/daughter ritual turns into important life lessons - Ahwatukee Foothills News: Community Focus

Daddy/daughter ritual turns into important life lessons

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Posted: Friday, March 22, 2013 10:49 am | Updated: 3:59 pm, Fri Sep 12, 2014.

About once a month my daughter and I have a very sweet daddy/daughter ritual that we have followed for the last six years. Typically on a lazy weekend afternoon, we drive over to the Ahwatukee Foothills Car Wash off Ray Road and when we get the car washed we grab a delicious, all natural fruit Popsicle. I tend to go with the piña colada flavor, especially in the hot Arizona summers when I like to imagine being in a tropical environment. My daughter tends to go with good-old natural strawberry and the little seeds are actually in the Popsicle. My daughter reminds me of this fact every time we go and I respond with enthusiasm and amazement as though this is new information.

I enjoy this sweet ritual and this time, our trip was made sweeter by a man named Victor. Victor is a quiet man who works at the car wash. I always enjoy saying hello to him and he has a very kind demeanor. This past Friday, Victor went above and beyond for us. The other day when my daughter and I were enjoying our cool, fruity snacks at the car wash, Victor came sprinting up to me in a bit of a panic. He felt concerned and stressed as he felt as though my car was not complete to his satisfaction, and he insisted that he run my car through the wash as well as vacuum the interior again.

I explained to Victor that I had not paid for a special detail and I am sure the wash was adequate. He then said something that really caught my attention. Victor shared, “Just OK is not OK.”

I smiled and before I knew it, Victor disappeared with my car into the VIP area where they do specialty waxing and detailing work. He insisted on taking an extra 20 minutes to thoroughly review my car, and even though there was a part of me that felt as though 20 more minutes was excessive, I knew in that moment that Victor was giving love through service, and he was taking pride in his work.

I used this moment to share with my daughter some of the many lessons that transpired in that experience:

• We always acknowledged Victor as a special person without any goal of receiving anything in return. We simply enjoyed him.

• Victor took pride in the service that was being provided and he did not even own the car wash. He easily could have said that adequate was good enough. Instead he rose above.

• The gift of receiving. I showed my daughter how sometimes it is important to receive someone’s efforts just as it is important to give one’s best.

• Victor has massive amounts of energy, I believe this is partially because he does not avoid work, but rather welcomes it.

• I had to surrender my “supposed” schedule and just let go of time and be in the moment.

• Sometimes there is just magic in enjoying some quality time together and this is possible because my daughter and I have created simple rituals that matter.

Oh yeah, the last lesson, we choose healthy natural Popsicles. Come on, did you think I could resist throwing in a little tid-bit about health!

Wishing you a week filled with the energy to make a difference and the presence to experience the joy it brings.

• Dr. Jason Kolber is a licensed doctor of chiropractic and a certified life coach. Reach him at (480) 704-2787 or

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