Ask Mikey Michelle Arana

Dear Mikey,

I have an annoyance going on with my family members, which has been going on for years and I am finally done dealing with it. Anytime there is a holiday, a birthday, or a special celebration I always invite everyone over to my house to celebrate over dinner, however, everyone refuses to go to my house and instead makes plans for everyone to go to their house.

I have voiced my feelings to my family to come to my house and I try to get them to tell me why they don’t ever want to come over to my house, but they never really give me a straight answer. My house is always clean; I live in a safe neighborhood, so I really don’t get it.

Any ideas on how I can convince them to come over?

— Wanting to host for once

Dear Wanting to host for once,

If you have tried talking with your family members and they are not being fair to at least include you in part of the rotation to have special dinners or celebrations, then they are not being very respectful towards you. All of your family members should be on a rotation schedule where one person hosts Christmas, one person can host Easter, one person can host Thanksgiving, and so forth. If it is a space issue, such as their house is bigger than yours and can accommodate more people, then that is still no excuse as you can host the smaller events while they can host the bigger events at their house. There is no reason that you can’t get on the rotation schedule that they are on.

Either confront your family members one last time, stop going to their events, or forever hold your peace if you choose to continue going to their houses.

• Ahwatukee Foothills resident Michelle “Mikey” Arana is a 2003 graduate of Mountain Pointe High School. She offers free peer advice, however, Mikey is not licensed or trained, just a fellow friend to the community. All inquiries made to Mikey will remain anonymous unless legal issues occur. She can be reached at

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